A Dacha in the Urals (and lots of pictures!)

Raisa, the dean and head of the international office of my university, invited me to visit a friend's dacha last month. She and some of her classmates from elementary and high school still get together at least twice a year and I was invited to join this mini-reunion. I was looking forward to our trip but also a bit apprehensive, because as usual, I never really know what to expect.

Raisa and Oleg, a young teacher at my university, picked me up early Friday morning for our 7 hour trek to the dacha. The dacha is located where the forest meets the edge of Lake Itkul', which is just outside of the town of Ufaley in the Chelyabinsk region. Ufaley is Raisa's hometown, or as Russian's say "native town", and also one of the oldest Russian cities in the Urals -- 248 years old to be exact.

I was happy the drive to Lake Itkul' was long because after a hectic month I was desperate for a chance to just rest and relax and mentally prepare for the weekend.  I was also looking forward to seeing some of the west Siberian countryside in daylight. The two lane highway to Ufaley is flanked by extremely dense forests, plains, and a few villages. It was a bumpy ride as there are lots of potholes and we kept weaving in and out of oncoming traffic. Despite feeling like I was on a roller coaster, I managed to sleep a little and otherwise I was pretty fixated on my new surroundings.

The most interesting part of the drive was definitely witnessing Russian police and "bribery" in action. Oleg's radar detector failed at one point and we were pulled over. The police here hang out in speed traps similar to the US, but here they stand outside of their cars with big batons and radar guns. If they catch you speeding, they run out and wave you over with the baton. Instead of them approaching you, you must go over to them. Oleg chatted with the police and ended up paying them a whopping 200 rubles (about $8 USD) to avoid an official ticket and off we went.

Speeding Ticket

When we got to Ufaley we drove past Raisa's childhood home and school. The differences between the two cities were immediately obvious. Tyumen is definitely more modern, yet still with a lot of charm, though I imagine Ufaley is more representative of other Russian cities. We met up with one of Raisa's friends, Sasha, in Ufaley and he guided us the rest of the way through a forest (seriously...dirt road through the forest!). We got to the lake around 5-6pm and it was pretty awesome. There are several little cottages, a banya, and an outdoor bbq all of which were built by the owner. The property is secluded on the waterfront with stunning panoramic views of the lake. The air was crisp and fresh and a welcome break from the city air.

Left to Right: Cottage, Banya, BBQ, Cottage
BBQ

Lake Itkul': Oleg, Raisa, Yura

Sasha preparing Shashlik

The other guests (all male by the way...I imagine I shouldn't have been surprised) arrived over the next couple of hours. Sasha a doctor, Tolya, Yura the compound okhrana (security guard), Zhenya a worker at Ufaley's famed nickel plant (almost all the nickel and cast iron in Russia is produced in Ufaley), Sergey the owner, and Valeri.

Once we all arrived eating and drinking quickly ensued. Sasha brought shashlik (shish kebab), which is a traditional dish that he marinated in Russian beer and cooked it over the open fire. It was really delicious.
The men then began to consume the 11 bottles of vodka, 3 bottles of wine, and a mini-keg they brought for the weekend. We all had a good laugh over the plethora of alcohol and Raisa kept telling me the vodka stereotype is one she keeps trying to break and that it is only true on special occasions such as this. I think this is why they were a bit confused as to why I wouldn't join them despite their persistent requests. If you've ever seen My Big Fat Greek Wedding try to remember the part where the aunt says "He don't eat no meat...what do you mean he don't eat no meat?! (crowd stands in shock) Oh, that's OK I make lamb!" That describes pretty much how I felt, except replace the meat with vodka, and replace the sweet aunt with a camo jumpsuit wearing Russian man and it was almost the same. "What!?! What do you mean you won't take a large shot of vodka? That's OK, you can have small shots of vodka!" Though I was told about all of the proven health benefits of vodka, I thought it was in my best interest to decline especially as I had already had a glass or two of wine.  Raisa had to explain to her friends that it was a "cultural difference".  I think it was the first time they had spent an extended period of time with an American so I was a bit of a curiosity and since Russians are extremely hospitable, they wanted me to feel welcome to participate with them. As a guest I was completely catered to the entire weekend. Others insisted that they prepare tea or coffee for me and they made sure we were well fed, happy, comfortable and warm.

On Friday night socializing and joke and story telling around the fire lasted until about 1am. It sort of reminded me of camping, but nicer, and fall at home. The temperature was cool, and I had been starting to think about how much I miss the fall air and bonfires around this time of year so it was really nice to have it for the weekend.

Story and Joke Telling: Raisa, Sasha, Zhenya, Yura

Saturday morning there was no rush to do anything but relax.  We had a big lunch of delicious chicken again prepared over the bbq by Sasha. I don't cook red meat for myself at all and I only occasionally cook chicken so two days in a row was a special treat. Some of the men went hunting, some began drinking. After breakfast/lunch, Yura took Raisa, Oleg and I out for a ride on the lake for a few hours. We made one stop and got out and walked around (apparently they did nuclear testing here during the Cold War!). After getting back on the boat we then we rode by this rock called "Devil's Rock".  Apparently, if you make a wish at the rock it will come true. Yura kindly wished that I would find a Russian husband.

Raisa & Me

Lake Itkul'

Devil's Rock

After our boat ride, while Sergey began preparing the banya, I learned how to shoot a gun. I am extremely fearful of weapons especially because I feel like I'd inadvertently injure myself. I didn't feel comfortable shooting the shotgun, but I did try what appeared to be a BB gun. I really lack hand eye coordination so not surprisingly I failed at hitting the targets (plastic cups). Everyone took turns shooting the guns and then Sergey and Valeri showed off their kill from the mornings' hunt...2 birds. I learned Sunday morning that it was in fact my breakfast. Lucky me!

Banyas (wet saunas) are incredibly popular in Russia. I really had no idea what a banya experience entailed, and I've never really spent much time in a sauna in the US, but it was pretty cool and I hope I will get to go to a banya again! First you have to dress in just a towel and/or a bathing suit. I opted for both. Inside the banya water is poured over scorching hot rocks creating a plethora of steam. You immediately begin sweating and it is also kind of difficult to breathe. You lay on the benches inside and then someone will take bunches of tree branches and start to pat (more like beat) you with them, apparently for health benefits. When the heat becomes too much you leave and this being my first banya experience my tolerance for the warmth was pretty low. However, despite my need for frequent breaks I did go in and out for a few hours! I thought everyone was joking/crazy when they said I would need to go into the lake after the banya considering it was about 45 degrees, but I did end up going in partly. The group made sure to look after me and made sure that I wasn't inside/outside long enough to make myself sick.

The rest of the evening was more low key than Friday save for the part where I thought one house was going to burn down. There is no running water at the dacha so I had to "shower" in the banya and when I was finishing up getting dressed in my cottage a flaming log fell from the fireplace onto the floor and it began charring the floor. I was able to run and get Sergei before there was an issue, but I was a little nervous for the remainder of the trip.

Sunday morning we got up and had breakfast and Yura's granddaughter who is about 17 came by the dacha with her parents. She was interested in speaking to me to gauge her level of English to see if it might be good enough to travel to the US. It was nice to speak to her and we exchanged e-mail addresses. She also invited me back to the dacha in the spring. We left soon after and on our way back we stopped at a roadside market selling figures from cast-iron. Raisa bought me a figure as a way to commemorate the experience, which was really nice of her. I chose a ballerina not because I dance but to remind me of my close friends and family that did. It was a completely new experience, fun and a bit overwhelming at times, but all in all a good weekend and without hesitation I'd do it again!

Zhenya, Me, Tolya, Sasha, Raisa

Market Selling Cast Iron Figures and Fish

A Russian Wedding

So the past few weeks have been absolutely crazy (in a good way) and I haven't had time to update about some of the wonderful cultural excursions I have taken part in. I will begin by sharing my experience at my first Russian wedding.

Last month, Zhenya invited me to her friends' (Dima and Marina) apartment. After only meeting them once, to my surprise, they invited me to their wedding!  I remember being in Russia a few years ago and being at Leo Tolstoy's estate seeing many brides wandering around and thinking to myself "things are certainly done differently here". Now I had a chance to experience it for myself.

Russian weddings typically take place over two days and almost never in a church - but in some type of wedding hall. The ring is a simple gold band and it goes on the right hand. It is common also for the groom to meet the bride at her home and participate in a series of competitions before heading out to the ceremony. Following the ceremony, the guests all travel to various spots in the city and take pictures and then eventually we end up at the reception. There is a clear influence of Western traditions, but they have evolved to become uniquely Russian.

On the day of the wedding Zhenya picked me up at 11am and off we went to Marina's parents' flat on the outskirts of Tyumen. Close family and friends gathered while Marina got ready for her big day. Zhenya and I helped decorate the apartment in preparation for Dima's arrival. Specifically - we put balloons and streamers and special wedding posters from the entry to the apartment to the door to their flat. Over the next two hours more and more guests arrived and around 1pm Dima arrived - with plenty of honking of course as is customary for all happy couples and their guests. Dima first had to gain permission to meet his bride by passing a series of "tests". Once Dima and Marina were united, there was the first toast of the day. Then off we went to the ceremony -- I even got to ride in the magenta limo adorned with decorative interlocking wedding bands on the roof. Everyone seemed to be concerned that I was having a good time and I felt like I was treated like a special guest - nice, but a little weird on someone else's special day!

The ceremony took place in a small room and there were 67 guests. There is a table where the bride and groom stand, and the ceremony, which only lasted maybe 20 minutes, was officiated by some woman. The couple signs documents legalizing their marriage and exchanges rings. Then the bride and groom have their first dance in this room. Next we visited another room - this time for pictures and more champagne, of course.

Following the ceremony we piled back into the limo and the celebrating picked up. We went to several spots to take pictures including a park, the eternal flame in Tyumen, and Tyumen's famous "bridge of love". Apparently several cities in Russia have bridges of love. Traditionally happy couples put a lock on the bridge and throw away the key into the river below.

Next up was the reception. As Zhenya had warned me, I was not able to sit with her as she and the "best man" sat with the bride and groom. Here, wedding parties don't really exist as it is just the two "witnesses" who are at the side of the bride and groom. The Russian ladies I sat with made sure to take good care of me and we did our best to communicate. Each and every guest must say their congratulations and wishes for the newlyweds and at the end the guests pass in their gifts (normally money) to the witnesses. I, of course, had to participate as well - and me being the special guest from America - I had to stand up and give a toast by myself (with help from Zhenya thankfully)! In between toasts there was plenty of food and drink, dancing and games. For example, blowing up and then popping a balloon with a fork, bidding for cake, and various dance competitions.

Dima and Marina's wedding was only one day...so it was definitely a marathon event - the reception went until 1am! I felt like I was part of their family for the day - Zhenya and Marina's grandfather (they're step-cousins) even invited me to his village - it was nice to feel so included!

Pictures!:

Dima on the left, "best man to his right", and Zhenya in the red -- this is outside of Marina's flat and Dima's first "competition".

The Wedding Hall
The Bridge of Love

This really happened...luckily while the cars were stopped, though they did try while we were moving.
The Reception -- one of the many games/competitions

"Moscow Never Sleeps"

The title says it all. For four glorious days I was in Moscow with fellow ETAs and Fulbrighters for an in-country orientation. I don't think I slept more than 15 hours the entire time, but it was well worth it.

In July we all met in DC for a 5 day pre-departure orientation. This meeting was for our "in-country orientation". Rather than having this "orientation" before we arrived in our cities, they decided to do it differently this year and had us all meet up after the first month. This was great because we all had a chance to settle (or in some cases finally arrive to Russia) before meeting up, so it was like a mini-vacation. We had time to relax and explore Moscow, finally had a chance to speak "normal" English, and shared stories and compared our experiences.

The ETAs are great and I am really happy that we all seem to get along quite well. It was especially fun to meet up, because we really won't have many opportunities to do so while we are here. There are 18 of us in Russia (which spans 11 time zones by the way), but we are all placed in different cities pretty far from one another - from the border with Ukraine to the Pacific Ocean. The closest ETA to me is a mere 225 miles away. We have a mid-year seminar in Moscow in late January, which is likely the only other time we will all be together at the same time.

The weekend got off to an exciting and sleepless start start. Thursday night I went to the theater with my students Nadya and Olga and got home pretty late and I had to be up for my 3 classes early on Friday. I was honestly relieved when my Friday afternoon group canceled on me (apparently students can do that...) and I squeezed in an hour long nap. I had a 6:30am flight on Saturday morning, which meant I needed to leave my apartment by 4:45am. I managed to pack early (a first for me...usually I am last minute), and instead of risking sleeping through my alarm, I rationalized that the responsible thing to do was to stay up all night. I figured I'd sleep on the 3 hour flight and nap when I arrived to Moscow. The former sort of happened, the latter did not.

Friday night I met up with a new friend, Grunya, and her friends, Dasha, Sergey, and Mariana, for my second night out in Russia. Grunya is a journalist with a local organization. Essentially, she follows the governor of Tyumen around and writes about all different events he attends - including the youth forum I attended. Grunya is about my age and spent a few months in Cape Cod with Russia's "work and travel" program. We clicked at the forum and decided to make plans to meet up later.

We went out to an English Pub, and once they ran out of vodka (not sure how that happened), we went to a traditional Russian beer house, with lots of middle-aged Russians dancing to live music. Then Sergey, Grunya and I went to a club, where I met two other Americans in Tyumen - before that I thought I felt like I was the only one here. I stayed out til about 3:30am, came home, showered, changed, and left for the airport.

Some of the ETAs decided to meet up a few days early for our orientation on Monday and Tuesday, and 6 of us arranged to stay at the same hostel. Saturday, after we all met up at the hostel, we ventured out into the city. We walked through GUM (massive luxury mall), Red Square, and spent several hours exploring the old Tretyakov Gallery. We had dinner at a really tasty, albeit accidentally expensive, Georgian restaurant. We spent the rest of the evening wandering around Red Square and slept only a few hours before setting out for our second day of sightseeing. Sunday morning we got up early and went back to Red Square and visited Lenin's memorial. I was really excited to see Lenin because I didn't go the last time I was in Russia. Also, apparently during WWII his body was supposedly kept in a building in the historical part of Tyumen - right by my university! The wait was a bit long to get in and they shuffle you through pretty quickly. It was pretty weird - it doesn't actually look like a person, but more of like a glow in the dark wax figure. Apparently part of the preservation method includes a dip in paraffin every 18 months, and rumor is that the only real part of him left is one of his hands. Next we stopped in the history museum off of Red Square, toured St. Basil's, and then went to the Izmaylovsky Market (really big souvenir market). After, we had to move from the hostel to the hotel and our group went to the produktiy across the street and grabbed some items for dinner including kielbasa, bread, mayo (which comes in bags), some beverages and stopped to buy some melon from a man selling fruit on the street. It was nice to spend the evening just hanging out together.

Although I don't know how I managed to get up Monday morning, I quickly perked up for our day at the Embassy. This was the second US Embassy I have had a chance to visit, and for whatever reason I felt like I was a kid in Disney World (I should mention being an Ambassador is sort of my dream job). We had a rather entertaining security briefing learning about petty theft in Moscow, how we should just hope we don't get hit by a car, and if we are involved in an accident in a taxi that it is recommended that we leave the scene. We also heard a few presentations including a really interesting lecture on the state of the economy and the Ambassador even made a surprise guest appearance! We stopped by the American Center in Moscow and the day concluded with a walking tour, which was led by a "babushka" who spoke hilarious English.

Tuesday it was back to the Embassy for an informal information session, and a chance to really talk with each other about our experiences thus far. After the meeting we got a tour of the embassy. We got to raid the English Language office for materials, which was great, especially because I had to leave most of my materials behind thanks to luggage limits. We had enough time to check out Checkov's house after, and then one by one we said our goodbyes and set out for our respective cities. I finally made it home around 1:30am my time and began lessons the next morning at 10am. I had 6 lessons in 2 days and spent ALL day Friday at my first Russian wedding. I am pretty sure a week later I am still sleep deprived, but I'm making it through each day and still all smiles after a great trip!

The Beginning

It is hard to believe, but I have been in Tyumen for about 6 weeks! I know this year will be one filled with incredible opportunities - including the chance for a little self improvement. For a different look at every day life, I thought I'd list some of the challenges I have faced and lessons learned even in the early stages of my adventure.

1. Expect the unexpected

I never know what each day will bring, but it is pretty much a given that something unexpected will come up. It is always great news when the unexpected is an invitation to an event or to a cafe, but otherwise it is always a unique challenge. For example: both my printer and the copy machine at the university running out of ink on the same morning of my first lesson for teachers, inadvertently purchasing spoiled food, speaking in front of the entire country with 30 minutes notice, no hot water for about 2 weeks, having an ATM machine eat my only debit card, the unexpected death of my surge protector and alarm clock, and learning how hot my iron gets the hard way (put a hole in one of my skirts).

This also applies in the classroom. Each time I meet a group (I've taught about 18 so far) and a new level of students, I have only a vague idea of how well they speak and inevitably there is a large amount of variability in skill level within the groups. This requires on the spot modification, and last week I even had to completely abandon a lesson and "wing it"....but my students actually clapped for me at the end of the lesson!

Initially this was daunting and frustrating, but I got over it and now I don't really react or worry when something goes slightly wrong. As a result I have become much less anxious and better at improvising.

2. Patience

I consider myself to be mostly patient, but I think I have become even more so. It seems that no one is in a hurry (except maybe Russian drivers), people enjoy each other and enjoy life...I am not sure yet, but it seems the "work to live" motto applies here. Not everything is done instantaneously, convenience isn't a necessity, and life moves slower here. Every day tasks take longer, the internet isn't utilized in the same way here, things seem to happen more last minute and are prone to changes. That being said I am trying to be more prepared in advance and to be more efficient with my time.

3. Communication

Let me first begin by explaining my Russian language background. I began informally learning Russian the summer before college, and then one day I decided I couldn't bear to sit through another day (it was the 3rd class...) of microeconomics and enrolled in my first formal Russian class sophomore of college. I studied that year and my senior year - with several years of Spanish and moving to Spain in the mix. I did well, but after being out of practice for a while, over the summer I tried to self-tutor and refresh my Russian, but it is now pretty obvious I failed in my attempts.

What does this mean exactly? Well, I can communicate on a basic level. I think my Russian (mainly listening skills) has improved in the last 6 weeks, but I still can't hold a conversation. Sometimes I understand the gist of a conversation without understanding every word, and sometimes I actually understand full (ok usually they are extremely basic) sentences, and sometimes I can't even decipher where words end and where they begin. I am also relying too much on English which is my own fault.

Even though I am able to rely on English, communication is still a big challenge and thus making friends and going about everyday tasks is harder. I generally have to simplify my English and my Russian is extremely limited making it difficult although entertaining (usually) to have a "normal" conversation. The exception is when I have a chance to speak with fluent speakers, although still some things just don't translate across cultures. Also despite the communication challenge, I am certainly learning more every day and I have still managed to buy a cell phone and other electronics, food, solve my ATM card issue (see below), and complete other daily tasks with my level of Russian and creative gestures. Also, I must say I have had no shortage of students or Russians interested to get to know me or ask me to get involved, which is a really great feeling.

4. Diplomacy and cultural understanding

My role here is not just to teach but to be a "cultural ambassador". It is behind the entire mission of the Fulbright program - to build mutual understanding through cultural exchange. For those who know me fairly well I'd say its extremely obvious that I have a strong interest in other cultures, traveling, etc.

I mentioned there is no shortage of interest of people in getting to know me, but with the interest comes a variety of usually loaded questions and usually in rapid fire. Some examples of questions I have been asked include: "Why did you choose to come to our city?", "Did you lose a contest?", "Why do you like Russia/Russians?", "Do you like our culture and traditions?", "Who do you think won the second World War?", "Isn't America much better?", "What do you think about the economy? President Obama?, US-Russian relations?, Georgia?, our city?, our people?, our country? our school? our food?, our men?, McDonalds?, etc". "What do you like about x, y, z...", "Do you really feel that way?", "Are you married?", "Can you help me with my English?", "How do you function without knowing much Russian?"...and the list goes on.

I respond honestly, but it can be a bit challenging with the language barrier to remain tactful. Also, in my observations, Russians are aware of the fact that Americans can be excessively polite in a disingenuous way and it seems to not be tolerated, so I find people sometimes may think I am being insincere when I am not. Still, it's fun to meet people interested in talking about the US while learning more about Russian culture. It's crazy to think that I could potentially shape someone's perspective of America and Americans.

5. Independence

Though I am just 6 weeks in, I think I have become more independent and I now know that I can function on my own. I really don't like to be alone and the thought of living alone was a source of anxiety before leaving for Russia. I have always had at least one friend in each new experience, from starting high school and college to studying abroad in Spain, and I have always had a roommate. Now I know how what it feels like to live by myself, to "prepare" all of my meals, to make friends without having any to start, etc. I have made sure I take advantage of every opportunity I get to meet new people or to do new things even if I am tired or feel slightly uncomfortable. Luckily, I think this has been a relatively comfortable transition for me because while I am on my own, I do feel extremely supported here.

I felt as prepared as I could be before arriving thanks to Katherine, the previous ETA. She gave me tons of information about her year in Tyumen before I arrived, and I mentioned this before, but I walked into my apartment fully equipped with supplies and materials. Also, both my host institution and Fulbright have been great. The Fulbright office has made itself always available as a resource, whether it is coordinating opportunities, sorting out various issues, or supplying us with directions to and from the airport. It is clear that if we need help, they will do their best to help us. My university has given me space, but they have been extremely accommodating as well. They have allowed me to be creative and take ownership of my classes, arranged for me to have my own personal student tour guides, and have enabled me to take advantage of different opportunities, etc. I have also found Russians in general to be extremely accommodating and patient. For example, I needed to buy ink for my printer, and a clerk was willing to take me on a 5 minute walk to a different store where I could find it. The ATM in one of Moscow's airports ate my card, and the engineer who came out to retrieve it for me walked me to a different ATM and made sure it worked, and then insisted on taking me to the bus I needed to get into the city. Each time I am invited to an event I feel like I am treated like a special guest.

I know it is still early on but I really can't say enough positive things about my experience thus far. I am really thankful for this opportunity and I feel like I have all of the tools I need for a successful year, and I am very much looking forward to it.